Reminiscing

Today suddenly I was reminiscing the feelings before I came here in the U.S.  I was never living somewhere totally stranger to me. Well, maybe the very first time was when I moved to Bandung from Malang. But even that, I still had some people I knew already (some friends from Malang also moved to Bandung, although I was not that close to them). Anyways.... That was different. Still pretty challenging, but nothing like me moving to the U.S.

Imagine you moved to a country very far from your home. Nobody there you knew before. You didn't know the law, regulations, cultures, etc etc. And then nobody are responsible for you. Meaning, all the income/spending totally on you. Nope, my parents did not help me financially at all. Which makes sense. I already worked before that anyway. Butttt... I quit working, no more income like that. Yes I had scholarship, but that scholarship was just enough. Really really tight spending on anything. I remember I couldn't really eat out without thinking how much money left I had in my bank account. I didn't have savings. That money I used to have, there would be no way I could ever spend on anything extra. Well, sometimes I still traveled to Austin to my BF, but we can't really spend money on anything either, there.

And yett, now, I belong here. I want to be here. I want to stay here like a tree. Grow all my roots into the ground so nobody can ask me to leave.

I'm so proud of myself to get this far. I don't always like me, but I realized this is not easy. It has never been easy. And I made it through. Baby steps, to the success. Thanks God. I know You are behind all of these.