Challenge or Comfort?

I guess human has issues. And one of the biggest issue is, we are never satisfied.
I think that kinda applies to me. When I was still in undergrad school, all I want was get a job. Once I got a job, I want to go back to school again, in another country (preferably U.S). And now, once I got into the school, I want to go back to the place I was once belong to!

I do miss my friends,
colleagues,
family,
colleagues. Did I mention that already? LOL. But yea, surprisingly I miss my colleagues at work, the MOST.
Cos they are people I got to see every single day for last past 4.5years. Since early in the morning until time to go home.
Well I have to admit, even though that time was the most comfortable moment of my life, there were couple of times I wasn't happy. Why? Cos I don't know what is next? Or maybe, I know TOO damn well what would happen next. I wake up, go to the office, work with those people, and repeat the same routine until I realize, I'm OLD already!

Now that reminds me why I came to US at first place. I was looking for new things. For challenges. And now once I face the challenge, I'm scared!

I think all I need to do is to remind myself everyday, what was my purpose at the beginning. And keep enjoying the moment, cos what's the point of living life, hoping for something different?

Cherish the moment, get to know more about the life, the world. Keep in having faith!!!

Homesick Akut!!!

Kayaknya kemaren2 benciiii banget ama Jakarta ampe sering banget ngelus dada bergumam "udah lah yaa...bentar lagi gue cabut ke Amrik. Say goodbye to all this shit.."

And you know what, Ive been crying these past few days!!! Homesick! LOL
I know it is only a month or so now, it is just the adjustment. And people have warned me before, FOCUS! It is only 2 years! Time will run fast you wont realized it.

Pertama yang bkin homesick itu... Gada mobil! Gw jalan tiap hari rumah-kampus-rumah. Kadang kalo lagi panas ya panas banget (ampe udah pasrah ni muka ntar jadi kek apa jadinya), pernah 1 kali tuh ujan dan gw kira ujannya bakal yang basa basi gitu. Jadi tetep nekatlah jalan cepet ke rumah cuma pake jaket ala kadarnya (jaket gaya, bukan buat ujan atopun dingin) daaannn keujanan kedinginan jalan 2km ke rumah. Trus pengen mewek, tapi ditahan.

Gue d Jakarta nyetir mulu! Ya walopun banyakan stop nya sih. Tapi I feel independent gitu. Disini ya kalo ga jalan, numpang temen, atau naik bus yang kadang datengnya telat, trus jalannya relatif pelan, dan most places masih harus jalan lagi dari bus stopnya.

OK gw akuin gw manja sih makanya kek gini. I just have never felt like this before. Pernah sih waktu baru kuliah d Bandung, tapi itu Bandung doank.. Masi Indo juga.. Jadi not so bad lah. Disini tuh kayak berasa lost aja gitu. Bukan negara sendiri, temen2 ada sih tapi ya yang ga deket2 amat. Belom lah. Palingan cuma share tentang kuliah aja.
Anyway I just bought a car. So hopefully things will be better after. Hopefully.

Kedua yang bikin homesick itu beberapa anak d kampus yang cukup "setan". Haha.. ini nulisnya sambil emosi. Tapi bener deh, kadang ada sih yang baik, tapi banyak juga yang gajelas gitu lho. Kayak ga ramah sama skali. Udah disalamin diajak kenalan, masi aja dingin. Ada juga yang dikiran udah baik nih. Eh, setelah merasa dia ga dapet keuntungan apa-apa, ditinggalin lah kita nih. Bangke ya?

Dannn yang paling terakhir bikin nangis itu, keilangan paspor! Duh gatau lagi deh kenapa bisa tiba2 kena masalah ini. Pas di sini pula. Udah gamau bahas, bikin sakit hati.

But I know I will get through this. I will learn a lot, I will be a stronger person!!!

SEMANGAT!!!

U.S Quick Update

Ternyata udah ampir sebulan euy ga nulis...
Antara sibuk, males, dan terlalu banyak hal yang terjadi, jadi males updatenya. Hahaha *loh kok jadi ga sok Bahasa Inggris lagi*
Anyway kalo ada yang follow Path pasti sering sih liat apdetan foto dan hal2 ga penting lainnya :D

Long story short, I was feeling very blessed and sad and touched bcos so many friends cared bout me when I was going to leave. Many farewell presents etc. And some I expected, some I didn't! That's why it was so touchy :')

Udah 2 mingguan disini dan kesan-kesan so far:
- Gw berasa anak kampung masuk ke peradaban. Why?? Okeh. Semuanya ada disini. Anything can make your life easy, you name it. Apa satu2nya yang ga ada? Pembantu! Hahaha.. That's the only thing. Kecuali lo tajir mampus, baru deh punya pembantu. Karena intinya di US itu service is veeryy expensive. Makanya tiap kali bayar sesuatu di resto sangat diharapkan ngasi tips!
- I was living in the busiest city ever, Jakarta. Yang mana tiap hari kayaknya seperempat idup gw abis di jalanan. Disini (terutama di kota Golden), totally different. Everything is very relaxing and everyone is very laid back and polite. Satu contoh kasus, tiap kali mo nyebrang jalan atau mau masuk pintu, pasti tunggu2an sapa yang duluan. Hahaha... Dan kadang ampe jadi awkward karna gada yang mau duluan! Anyway, idup gw jadi sehat banget karna tiap hari jalan kaki +/- 9km. Bukan sengaja sih sebenernya, tp karna belom beli mobil aja kekekekeke...
- Oh about the school. I used to study at the BEST uni in Indo. But, well, once I'm here, jadi kayak banyaaaak hal2 yang bikin miris kalo inget2 IT* (sensor). To start with, disini mata kuliah itu kayak "candy shop" kalo istilah beberapa student. Kita sampe bingung mau ambil mata kuliah apa karna semuanya bagus dan menarik. Daannn, cepet full sama anak2 lainnya yang juga daftar (ada kapasitas maksimal). Dan karna skolah ini relative kecil juga, semua professor udah kayak temen kita aja. Discussion is very very encouraged, mau kapanpun mereka available most of the times. Kalo lagi pas ga ada di kantornya, email aja, janjian ketemu. Hari ini baru aja gangguin salah 1 prof buat install software di laptop gw yang akhirannya abis sejaman aja gitu wwkwkwk.. And he was very very nice!
Oh satu lagi juga, kampusnya bagus!! Jadi inget di IT* ga bole injek rumput, ga boleh d kampus ampe malem, dsb dsb. Disini semuaaaa murid pasti leyeh2 di rumput, olahraga, bahkan masang ranjang gantung di antara tiap pohon2. Mau nginep di sekolah juga basically boleh2 aja (gw sih ogah) hahaha...

dan masiii banyak hal lainnya yang mungkin lain waktu deh dishare disini :)
EH tapi itu yang bagus2 doank ya.
OK gw share yang agak downside:
Segalanya dikerjain sendiri. No maid, no one will help you doing daily works.
Segala yang lo bayar, blom include tax dan tips.
I needed to make new friendships. Well, sometimes it is fun, sometimes it is a pain in the ass. Depends.
Kadang ada aja orang-orang yang bikin lo MALEZ pake Z pake tanda seru kalo bisa.
SO many rules yang harus lo perhatiin kalo gamau getting in trouble.
Contoh: ati2 sama race/sexual jokes, etc. Basically karna sangat beda kultur juga sih, jadi harus banyak belajar juga.

I think that's all for now. Til next update/story!

Good People

As we all know, we can't avoid the bad or mean people, or simply people who are jealous of us, talking bad about us, hurt us, etc.
It's just life. Suck it up and deal with it.

But aside of that, I've been telling myself over and over again about how some people are really simply like an angel to me.
Oh well maybe angel is a bit too much. LOL. But they are really just lovely people.

I was planning to make a farewell lunch with all my friends and colleagues at work and even I tried not to invite every single ones I know, it already reached 70++ people. LOL
So I was thinking, man, that's a lot :'( and I would need to save some money to for my life in the US.
But well I thought, it's OK lah.
I made the invitation and sent it out to everyone.

Later my boss came to my office and talked to me:
B: We are buying your lunch
Me: What do u mean?
B : You tell me. You sent out the invitation
Me: Oh yes. Yea.. I'm buying my lunch
B: No No..We are buying your lunch. The department will pay for it. Don't you pay anything.

*speechless*

Jadi orang ngapa baik bener ya? :')

And not only him. Some people are realllyyy helpful, some offered their help if I got to the US. Tell me to contact them, their friends, etc.. etc..

You know what, this, this kind of thing, is what helping me putting up with difficult people.
Brush it off, tell em to fck the hell off, and simply just appreciate those who are worth your time.

Updates on June

While I'm writing this, this is the first day of Ramadhan, the first day where there's no food around the office like usual (biasanya tiap menit adaaa aja makanan ini dan itu). The first day we gonna suffer from even worse traffic (biasanya udah parah, well.. double that).

And it is less than 2 months for me to leave for Colorado.

It will feel less than that even, maybe, since after Ramadhan people will mudik for +- 2weeks (including me actually). So by the time I came back from vacation, I will take another weekend gateaway to do my farewell dive, and one week space to do farewell to friends (mainly the office friends), and then.. buhbye :)

By now I almost completed everything. Last night I just made sure that the last important document (which is my health and immunization record) has been received by the school. Quite a funny experience for me. So I emailed the school asking whether they have received my document and they didn't reply. It was suggested on the website that I call their number and they will be available most of the time.

Well remembering the time zone difference, I planned to call at 9pm or later, and I checked on telkomsel, how much does the international cost, etc.
So apparently telkomsel has a good deal. It is Rp 3500/10 minutes. I bought the first 10 min only to think later that I'm afraid 10min won't be enough. So I bought another 10min of call credit.

I rang the health officer:
O: CSM health and blablabla (I forgot), this is Denise speaking

me: Hi Denise, I'm an international student from Indonesia. I just sent my document on 15th of June and I want to make sure that it has been received

O: what is your student number?

me: it is xxxxxxxxxx

O: and your last name?

me: harryandi. H, A, R, R, Y, A, N, D, I

O: OK it's received. Thanks Sheila

me: Oh OK thank you

(tut tut tut....)

one minute only :|

what a waste, buying 20 minutes of international call credit! LOL

I guess I'm just very used to the complicated-ness of Indonesian people.

So anyway, right now I'm just thinking how bad I wanna get out of this city (remembering the traffic nightmare - Oh- I had enough of it!)
And some small group of people (I wrote about this before, yea that party friends of mine) just made me wanna move earlier than ever.

But of course there are more people that I will leave that I really care about as much as they care about me. Sigh. Hopefully I won't cry on my farewell day! Hahaha...

Aannnd, I conclude that I will bring more food than clothes! Afterall that would be my biggest struggle there :(

Some conversation

I talked to this friend of mine, at work. He's been one of the most supportive friends so far. He always asked me bout my updates, am I doing well, etc. Sometimes he's more like a father at work. LOL

Anyways, I asked him last time

"why do you always look happy? It looks as if you don't have any problem in your life"
"of course I do. But I always think of the future. And what I do now will affect my future. That's what I'm focusing on. There's nothing I can change of my past, it's over. And many people are still stuck in their past"
"umm.. yea that's true"
"People do mistakes. But that's how they learn. You cannot do exactly the same things, and expect different outcomes."

Nice words, fella. Nice words.

Double Standard

Last night I was thinking bout this topic. No no, it's not about feminism. But it's more about our personal double standard.
Like, when someone did something not nice, you will despise them. But then one day you found yourself, did EXACTLY the same thing. How do you feel about that?

I feel I kinda make justification bout what I did. Yep. So you know now, when in life you kinda question people , "WHY? WHY? Don't they have heart? " you know what is the answer. Cos basically we are human. We do what we want to do. Of course, some of us have stronger boundaries or principal more than the others. But yea that's the main point.

So what you should do when someone do bad things to you? Just be calm and think "oh well that's human. And this is life" ?
A friend of mine just said something like, "well you can't guarantee someone wouldn't change. I think the answer will be, deal with the pain"

I said, "you are totally right".
We can only put so much effort, and be prepared for anything out of our plan.
It will be sucks, of course. But, well, isn't that life?

I will put one quote from the movie I watched recently,
"I'd been let down in my life so many times. Why should I have gotten my hopes up, right?"