New is Always Better

Kinda remember one of the quote by Barney Stinson on HIMYM

"New is always better"

Though it's silly and not 100% true, I think it makes sense.

And why it is better is not always because that person is better (well sometimes they are), but because of the moment.

Do u realize that in every relationship, the best moment was the PDKT moment? Of course. When the relationship has died, all you need to do is find something new.

Well.. It works so far

Fool

I think I have been a fool all this time and now it is enough.

People say "Just move on".

I did.

Life is too short to waste on someone.

Happiness

Something bothered me lately bout this topic. I think, sometimes people would define happiness (that they think of) for others. Do u get my point here? Sometimes people would feel sorry about others who did not do, or achieve, or experience the same things as theirs. And sometimes I wonder, who can really define my happiness if not myself?

Some people would think an achievement of happiness is when they are settle. Have job, have someone they are engaged to- particularly someone who's settle also. Have kids. Have house, or houses. Have their own business, so on, so on.

Some would think that is pathetic. Especially in young age. "Who would want a settle life in that early stage of life?", they said. "you haven't seen enough of this world and u already settled in?"

Doesn't that confuse you? So, am I happy now? Some would think my life is fantastic. Some would think, nah, it's not enough. You're being too safe. Some would say, you have a perfect life-but... u miss something WE THINK you need to have. And so on, and so on.

Honestly, I'm so jealous of people who can really define their own happiness without letting em affected by others' opinion. I would love to tell those people WHO THINK they know better what is good for me: Fck off and live your own pathetic life. Don't get me wrong, I'm not angry with anyone right now. I'm just, confused.

So then now I start listing my own "happy-list". What truly makes me happy?
- I'm happy when I travel and see new things
- I'm happy when my boss think I did a great job and hand me even more serious tasks to do
- I'm happy when I get my spa package
- I'm happy when I get to shop cute things
- I'm happy when I spend time with my lovely guy
- I'm happy when I eat something really good
- I'm happy when I get to watch new movies and it's awesome
- I'm happy when I see myself in a mirror and think "I'm not that bad afterall"
- I'm even happy enough when I only sit on my couch and watch serial. At least that what makes me comfortable
- I'm happy when I meet my old friends and trade funny stories
- I'm happy when I get my salary paid

and so on

I must admit sometimes I'm happy bout something because people defined it as some achievements. Oh how I wish I did not live in this such judgmental community, how I could truly define my own happiness..

Cause in the end of the day, would they care? They talk, even when they do not care..

LDR (part 4)

Buat yang pada penasaran kelanjutan cerita LDR inih... *pede tinggi*

Actually it is exactly like what I predicted it to be. One word. Sucks.

Wkwkwk... And it's even worse cause I deal with a guy who goes to his cave A LOT. Diitung2 udah sebulanan nih LDR. Arguing-nya (bukan berantem kata saya mah, kata dia juga bukan) udah total 3x.

 My patience has been tested whole time! Tapi kok yah, masi demen aja yah? Wkwkwk...

I'm trying to stay positive whole time. It takes a lot of work. But well, maybe this is the true test afterall?

Aminkan saja. Kalo jodoh kan ga kemana ya? :">

LDR (part 3)

"So how do u feel?"
"feel what?"
"about me leaving"
"well.. I try not to be mellow" (walking away)
(reaching out, hug) "you know, I wish I had met you earlier"
(crying)

"don't cry"
"that's what I've been trying to!"

***
"I'll call you tomorrow morning. So don't make a scene downstairs. Don't cry. OK? Otherwise I won't call you (giggle)"
"...." (tears come out like waterfall) "I want to go to restroom"
"Okay"

(Inside the elevator)
(cry out louder)
"don't cry, that's not the memory we should remember"
"I knoow!! (cry even louder)"
"I knooww (mimicking) see now you even singing (laugh)"
(joining in laughter)


***
(text)
It was good to spend time with you.
Even though I was chocked up mentally
I hope the next few weeks go by fast
August is not too far away
I don't know what to say or how to express myself. It's been a lot for me to experience and go through...
Wish we had more time together, but soon


I hope so too :')

LDR (part 2)

LDRnya aja belom, tapi udah part 2. Wkwkwkw...

Okeh jadi by the time I write this, abah brangkatnya lusa T_T

Cediiihhhh huaaa :'(

Belom ampe nangis2an sih, dan kalo bisa sih ngga usah pake acara gitu2lah. Malyu. Hihi.. Walopun di kala malam melanda biasanya saya jadi galo dan mewek2 sendiri..

Saya jadi inget serial HIMYM yang (lupa season brapa) Ted pacaran sama Victoria dan akhirnya suatu saat Victoria harus pergi kerja ke tempat yang jauh, dan memaksa mreka buat putus. Di situ Marshall ngomong ke Ted, kira2 gini,
"Ted, think about it this way. If you knew that you were going to lose your leg tomorrow, would you sit on the couch and cry about it or would you run and jump and do some awesome air kicks while you still could?"

Jadi di hari2 terakhir abah kerja di Jakarta, kami justru bikin quality time dan seneng2 hepi2 aja daripada sedih2an. Dan justru di saat2 terakhir ini si abah jadi makin suwit :">

Oke sampe sini, kalo udah agak ngerasa geli2 jijay bacanya, please jangan diterusin :)) *LOL

Jadi 2 hari lalu pertama kalinya saya nemenin abah ke acara temennya. Plus one-nya lah istilahnya. Maybe some of you would say, "okay.. what's the big deal? Isn't everyone do the same while they're dating?"
Not for us, apparently.. Saya ngga pernah ngundang abah jadi plus one saya di acara siapapun, dan dia juga gitu sebelumnya. I'm sure it's not about he being ashamed of me, but more because we don't really want to be too public. Well, not we, him. Kalo saya sih sbnrnya biasa aja. Keliatan orang gapapa, ngga juga gapapa. Asal jangan keterusan aja ampe bertaun2 pacaran masih diem2an.
Kalo kata abah, dia emang orangnya private bgt untuk urusan begitu. Apalagi di depan orang2 kantor, kesannya agak kurang profesional aja kalo macar sekantor gitu. Keliatan orang lagi jalan berdua ngga papa, tapi ngga pernah bener2 officially dibawa2 ke acara gitu.

Nah, jadi pas hari Sabtu kemarin tiba2 abah bilang, "I'm going to P***'s going out party. He's leaving for his next assignment, too. Do you wanna come?"' Saya: come to your place? *belaga bego* Him: "not come to my place. Come to P***'s party with me. I'll let him know I'm bringing guest. His wife will be curious to see who that guest is, cause she always tries to match me up"

Trus gue eksaitit sih. Tapi belaga cool dikit. Kesannya akhirnya gue diakui gitu :') *sedih bet deh lo Shel*

The party was going pretty well. I think I did a pretty good job as his plus-one. Tried to be friendly enough in front of his friends who is in the same company as me. Ditambah hal2 sweet lainnya yang sebenernya pengen sih gue ceritain disini, tapi, sudahlah. Ntar yang baca makin eneg "ini lo crita apaan sih." LOL

He said he's coming on August. For one week.

Me: One week after my brother's wedding ya? Not before, cause I'm having training week before
Him: Yes. The weekend, and one week after that
Me: Are you going somewhere else or Jakarta only?
Him: Jakarta only. Hey,  I'm coming to see you

:">

LDR (part 1)

udah mayan lama juga ya saya ngga ngebacot disinih. Hihi... Sering sih kepikiran mo nulis apa gitu, tp pas keinget, lagi d rumah dan ga enak deh ngeblog pake hp itu. Jadi lupa smua deh yang mo ditulis.

Anyway busway, si abah (sebut saja demikian, berhubung umurnya jauh wkwk) udah mau pindah tugas ke Kuwait. Yes. Kuwait. Deket bgt yah? :) *sarcasm detected

Sebenernya sih dari usia 2 minggu kita kenal, dia udah ngasi tau soal kepergiannya ini. Dan dia juga baru tau saat itu juga. Tentunya dan pastinya saya siyok donk ya. WHAT?! trus maksud lo, deketin gue, apa??

Ngga deng, itu dalem ati aja. Aslinya saya cuma bilang, "hah? So what happen to this? I won't see u anymore then?"
Jadi sebenernya ketika dia ngasi tau ke saya (which is around Oktober awal), itu rencananya dia bakal hengkang Desember ato Januari gitu. Trus dia cuma jawab, "well let's see how things going between now until the end of this year. If it's something serious, then, ... But we can meet in between. Maybe Spore.. bla3x"

Eh kok ya keterusan aja abah ngga brangkat2 ampe bulan ini. Yang mana kalo diitung2 kita ngedate udah, mm.. 9 (sembilan) bulanan loh. *applause by me for me*

By the time saya nulis ini, dia brangkatnya minggu depan. *nangis bombay*

I hate LDR.
Of course.
Who doesn't?

And honestly, I'm not so sure it will work out.

Things always get messy once he's away. Saya jadi needy.. Dia jadi diem. Dan slalu jadi baek lagi pas ketemu. Itu cuma kalo ditinggal seminggu dua minggu pas dines kluar negri. Gimana kalo berbulan-bulan? *sigh

Orang biasanya jadi komentar, "lo ngga dibawa ikutan aja kesana Shel?"

Menurut L?

Gw sih mau aja sebenernya, LOL

But again, it's just 9 months. If it's still going on until 2 years, that is when I'll give more pat on my own shoulder. LDR is not for everyone, afterall.